By Dennis Abrams
Profiles the lifestyles and profession of the writer Anthony Horowitz.
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The vulture granny moaned. ” Granny Smith said. “I hate their perfect skin. It’s all pink and shiny and smooth. I hate their hair, so thick and wavy. ” She gazed at her own on the table in front of her. “Do you know where children keep their teeth? In their mouths! ” “I hate children because they’re so healthy,” Granny Anne went on. “They’re always shouting and playing and having fun and running about. ” “I hate them because of everything they’ve got,” Granny Adams muttered. “We never had computers and pop music and T-shirts and mountain bikes.
Granny 82–84) But if grannies hate children, they all have their own ways of getting revenge. They poke them. They pat them on their heads. Give them wet messy kisses. Give them presents that they know they will hate like talcum powder, or a book mark. They buy them ugly clothing that they know they’ll have to wear. According to Granny, all the things people think that grannies do because they are old and do not know any better, they are really doing on purpose! As in Roald Dahl’s classic book The Witches, which reaches its climax at a convention of witches, Granny culminates at a convention of grannies.
Mrs. Warden giggled. ” 55 56 ANTHONY HOROWITZ But in fact she was so exhausted after her day’s shopping that she quite forgot to cook. That evening, Mr. Warden and Joe sat at the table staring gloomily at three tins [cans] of pink salmon. Mrs. Warden was even gloomier. She couldn’t find the tin opener. On Tuesday the dishwasher broke down, much to the horror of Mrs. Warden, who hadn’t washed a dish herself since 1963 (and then she had only rinsed it). The next day she went out and bought a hundred paper plates which were fine with the main courses and puddings but caused problems with the soup.
Anthony Horowitz (Who Wrote That?) by Dennis Abrams